Why, oh why, are so many Greek statues, well… penis-less? Before you jump to conclusions, it’s not just a wild ancient Greek party gone wrong!

For starters, those early Christians weren’t fans of nudity. They were known for altering ancient art with a hammer and chisel. Then there were those other conservative folks across millennia who engaged in acts of vandalism. Now, add in the wear and tear of earthquakes, rain, and weather. It turns out that Hercules’ abs could endure for centuries, but his ‘little Hercules’ not so much. Speaking of which, have you ever wondered why most Greek statues have smaller private parts?

Well, back in the day, a smaller package meant sophistication and self-control. So yes, while you could bench-press a mountain, your ‘centurion’ stayed tiny, at least if you had your own statue.

Now, the fun begins! In this card game, you channel your inner detective and reunite these statues with their long-lost (and, let’s be honest, upsized) penises. To keep things spicy, we’ve color-coded these sculptures and their assets.

Time to make some classic matches!

 

Created by Lukas Birk, Fragkiskos Sakellaridis & Nora Jaccaud